ON RAISING CHILDREN: PAY ATTENTION MOM AND DAD

Dear Moms and Dads of America,

If you own, or have seen, photographs of your children and one of your brood looks like this in any photo,

or appears looking like this, 

or smiles such,

do America a favor.
Do not...

I repeat, DO NOT...

buy them a gun as a gift.  

As a matter of fact, if they possess a gun, take it away from them...by force if you have to! 

And please, for the sake of your fellow citizens, after you have screwed up this child's life with your sexist or racist or alcohol or drug-infused rants about getting screwed by "them," or your unwillingness to hold them responsible for any of their actions, or your unwillingness to sink all your savings into making them well or keeping them from harming members of your society, do us all a favor.  

If they use the guns you allowed them to own to kill your friends and/or neighbors, take it upon yourself to do the following.

Blow both your own damn brains out as well. 

You are responsible for making these horrible creatures, not us.

With love,

Martin